Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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