Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
