When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
