the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
