If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
