i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
