did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
you never un-have a 4some
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
