Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize