haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
