I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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