$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
my sisters under your porch take her home
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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