bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
