New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
