and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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