Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
