it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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