According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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