so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
