We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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