youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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