i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
