woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
