I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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