I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
