Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize