She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
