Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
organizing the empties. That sober.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
