If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
