what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
