when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
