That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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