i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize