Me too!
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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