Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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