Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
they call him Oral-B. enough said
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
