Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
