Is it because I queefed?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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