yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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