Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
