Joe is yelling at the trees again.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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