drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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