i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm like, not good at living.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
