and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize