ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
You've changed since you got that strap on
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
