i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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