I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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