You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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