Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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