i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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