I want to stick my p in your. b.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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