"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
